Better Together
Better Together
Ecclesiastes 4:4-16
Dwight Lyman Moody, a prominent evangelist in post-Civil War America, sat with Henry Varley, also a respected preacher in England before returning to America and Varley’s words changed Moody’s life. Varley looked at Moody and said, “Moody, the world has yet to see what God will do with and for and through and in and by the man fully and wholly consecrated to him.” Moody was struck by the sentence. Like a bolt of lightning to his soul, he determined right then and there and said in his heart, “I will be that man.” Moody’s life from that point forward was marked with an incredible zeal and passion for lost souls. He gave his life to the proclamation of the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Moody determined to share Christ every day of his life. One evening at around 10 pm, he was in bed and he realized that he had not shared Christ with anyone that day. He woke up got dressed walked outside and found a man standing by a lamppost. Moody approached him and asked, “Are you a Christian?” The man responded in going to a violent rage and threatened to knock Moody down and into the gutter. That man would go and complain to one of the elders in the church that Moody was, “doing more harm in Chicago than ten men were doing good.” The elder pleaded with Moody to temper his zeal with knowledge. Three months later after being chastising for his zeal for souls, Moody was awakened in the middle of the night by that man he met by the lamppost saying, “I want to talk to you about my soul.” The man shared how he had no peace in his soul ever since that faithful night on Lake Street when Moody confronted him with the gospel of Christ. The man repented of his sins and trusted in Christ and became a man full of zeal himself for the cause of Christ.
Moody was not a perfect theologian or a refined gentleman or a polished orator, but his life was marked with a passion for souls. Everyone who knew him, even his detractors, could not deny his love to share the gospel with unbelievers. His life was marked with a passion for sinners. What marks your life? Those who know you best, what would they say? What defines who you are? What marks your life? The Preacher in Ecclesiastes provides a section of proverbial wisdom to challenge and encourage his hearers to have their lives marked with certain characteristics that would lead to a better life. If you want a better life, you must ask yourself what marks your life? We must take an honest look. I want to help us take that honest look by asking three diagnostic questions from the Preacher’s words to help us discover how we can lead a better life and Lord willing show what is the best life. What marks your life? First question,
Is your life marked with Envy or Contentment?
The Preacher begins this section by addressing the issue of work. Work is a key theme throughout this book as it is a key theme throughout our lives. Solomon offers practical advice to protect from a wrong perspective of work and to teach us a better way to live. Ecclesiastes 4:4–8,
[4] Then I saw that all toil and all skill in work come from a man's envy of his neighbor. This also is vanity and a striving after wind.
[5] The fool folds his hands and eats his own flesh.
[6] Better is a handful of quietness than two hands full of toil and a striving after wind.
[7] Again, I saw vanity under the sun: [8] one person who has no other, either son or brother, yet there is no end to all his toil, and his eyes are never satisfied with riches, so that he never asks, “For whom am I toiling and depriving myself of pleasure?” This also is vanity and an unhappy business.
The Preacher begins with the introductory statement, “Then I saw all the toil and all skill in work,” then he immediately adds the motivation for the person’s work, “from a man’s envy of his neighbor.” Is your life marked by envy?
Envy is the sinful desire to have qualities or possessions or life situations that belong to someone else. Envy is subtle and often slowly draws us in before it take over our heart. We live in a world where people often put their best foot forward, whether it be the new chair they bought, receiving an amazing discount, a filtered picture of a good hair day, the recent exotic vacation or finishing a new book. Sharing any of these things is not bad or wrong, but if our eyes look and long after them it may drop the seed of envy in our hearts. The Preacher says people are working so that they could have what others have rather being content with what they have. Life is a gift, not gain.
There is a very dangerous trap that our world holds. The trap invites your heart to long after the earthly prosperity of those who are far from God. Social Media reveals what people value and they invite you into their value system. Asaph recalls how he fell into this trap in his day, The Psalmist confesses in Psalm73,
[1] Truly God is good to Israel,
to those who are pure in heart.
[2] But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled,
my steps had nearly slipped.
[3] For I was envious of the arrogant
when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
The Psalmist then recounts some of the prosperity he witnesses compared to his lack of prosperity despite laboring to keep his heart clean and pure and fighting sin. He was almost at the point to throw up his hands and say, “I am done with following God. Their lives look much better than mine.” Then the Psalmist contends, Psalm 73:16–19; 26-27
[16] But when I thought how to understand this,
it seemed to me a wearisome task,
[17] until I went into the sanctuary of God;
then I discerned their end.
[18] Truly you set them in slippery places;
you make them fall to ruin.
[19] How they are destroyed in a moment,
swept away utterly by terrors!..
[26] My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
[27] For behold, those who are far from you shall perish;
you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you.
The Psalmist felt his heart envying to be like the wicked until he thought of their end. Those who live apart from God will perish. Envy is one of the seven deadly sins and is addressed in the last of the Ten Commandments, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house, you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male servant…or anything that is your neighbors.”
The Preacher looks at the world and notices that people are laboring and striving after more possessions because of envy. They want to keep up with “Joneses.” One of the best ways to discern if you are in danger of envy is asking how you feel when something good happens to someone else. Are you angry or frustrated or discouraged that you did not receive what they had? Do you rejoice in God’s kindness to them or reject God’s kindness to you? As it has been said, “Any friend can share your sorrows and failures, but it takes a true friend to share your joys and successes.” Notice what the Preacher is saying, he points his finger at the human heart and says all your labor and toil is ultimately about yourself. You are living for me not we. Envious work is motivated by a self-interest.
There are two twin dangers that may develop with his self-interested motive: idleness and idolatry. Ecclesiastes 4:5, “The fool folds his hands and eats his own flesh.” The idle person does not care for others, but only for his own flesh. As David Gibson writes, “Instead of embracing life and giving himself to others, the sluggard gives himself to himself so in the end all that he has left is himself and that won’t last long.[1]” If we are consumed with self, one danger is idleness where we do not use our gifts to serve and build up others. The other danger of work motivated me, myself and I is the idolatry of work or workaholism. Two hands full of toil is striving after the wind. The person who gives himself to himself in accumulating wealth misses the joy of living life in community. The Preacher paints the picture of an Ebenezer Scrooge, Ecclesiastes 4:7–8,
[7] Again, I saw vanity under the sun: [8] one person who has no other, either son or brother, yet there is no end to all his toil, and his eyes are never satisfied with riches, so that he never asks, “For whom am I toiling and depriving myself of pleasure?” This also is vanity and an unhappy business.
The man only wants more, more, more and never stops and asks, “For whom….” am I working. What marks your life? Is your life marked with envy? Is it marked by folding your hands and caring only for yourself? Is it marked by overworking for more money, more responsibility and more recognition for the sake of your own name and not the good of others? Seriously, ask yourself, what is your life marked by? We all lean to a particular direction. Ask the hard questions now so you won’t “eat your own flesh” or “strive after the wind?”
The Preacher tells us what is better than envy. “Better is a handful of quietness than two hands full of toil and a striving after the wind.” One handful of quietness is a picture of one who has found balance. He is not idle nor he is working too much. He is content. The Bible speaks often of contentment.
1 Timothy 6:6–8, “[6] But godliness with contentment is great gain, [7] for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. [8] But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.”
Philippians 4:11–13, “[11] Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. [12] I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. [13] I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”
Hebrews 13:5–6, “[5] Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” [6] So we can confidently say,
“The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear;
what can man do to me?” (ESV)
The secret of contentment is having Christ. He will never leave you nor forsake you. If we have chosen Christ, if he is our good portion, then we have enough. Christ has given us himself. He has paid for our sins. He has given hope for eternal life. He has promised a glorious inheritance. If I have Christ, I have enough. Is your life marked with kind of contentment? Are you satisfied with who you are in the Lord? Are you content with your lot? Is the Lord enough for you? Paul said, “I have learned…contentment[2]? Beloved, better is a handful of quietness. I pray you will learn and have a life marked with contentment.
Is your life marked with Isolation or Community?
Second question, is your life marked by isolation or community? The question may seem unfair in a global pandemic, but the pandemic may have revealed that you had a life of isolation before you were forced to have one. The Preacher makes it clear, two are better than one. We were made for community. God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit forever live in perfect community and being made in His image, we were made for community. It is not good for man to be alone. Ecclesiastes 4:9–12,
[9] Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. [10] For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! [11] Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? [12] And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
The Preacher offers a proverb and reason why the Proverb is true and then 3 examples. First, the Proverb, “Two are better than one.”
Remember the Preacher is addressing toil and labor under the sun and he has shown how those working in envy, motivated by self-interest, have money, but do not have anyone to share their riches with. The reason two are better than one is because they have a good reward for their toil. The real value of life is not what you gain, but whom you share it with. Joy is not found in isolation, but in community. Samuel Johnson argues, “To be unhappy at home is the ultimate result of all ambition.” A constant striving for self may create a thick wallet but leaves a thin soul. We is better than me. We isolate ourselves to protect ourselves only to discover that the risk of relationship is the path to reward. How much more can be accomplished when people work together? Two is better than one. Two is better than one when cleaning the house. Two is better than one in carrying a couch upstairs. Take five minutes this afternoon and remind yourself how much better two is than one. We are meant to share life with one another.
The Bible says that the love of money is the root of all kinds of evils and wants to lead you away from God and contentment and joy. David Gibson contends,
It is possible to know the price of everything but the value of nothing. If the love of money is a root of evil, then Ecclesiastes—and indeed the whole Bible—has a beautifully simple solution. Here is how to sever the root, stop the rot, and kill the evil: spend your money on others. Give it away. Do it regularly, gladly, generously—and you will be happy. Where wealthy people love their neighbors by working for them as much as themselves, and love them with their own hard-earned money, the beautiful by-product is that they end up loving themselves. They actually provide the best kind of care for themselves because they are no longer alone.[3]
Joy is not found in self-protection but in generous love toward neighbor. Is your life marked by isolation or community? Me or we? Hoarding or sharing? Giving or taking?
The Preacher gives three examples why two are better than one using the illustration of travel in the ancient world. Travel in the ancient world was dangerous and not wise to be done alone. Two are better than one, “For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!” Think of someone traveling and they slip and fall into a pit, they are stuck unless they have someone there to pull them out. Two are better than one to overcome the cold, “Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone?” People did not travel with hand warmers or sleeping bags, but probably only a tunic or cloak so they needed the warmth of someone’s body heat to survive the elements. Two are better than one if attacked, “And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Two are better than one.
The Preacher shows how two are better than one in facing physical dangers, but how true is the principle when applied to spiritual dangers. How much easier is it to overcome stumbling and falling away from the faith in community? We need each other to help us when we fall. How easy is it to grow cold in our affections for Christ? We need each other to rekindle and fan the flame of our love for Jesus. How often do we face false teachers and ideologies that threaten to prevail against our faith and lead us to destruction? We need each other to protect us from error and encourage us to hold on to the faith once delivered to the saints. We may be lulled into thinking that we are better alone, but do not believe the lie. Two are better than one. Self-protection may lead to self-destruction. Connection is better than competition.[4] You cannot serve someone if you are in competition with them.
There is a very real danger facing our congregation. Our fellowship is being threatened. Over the last several months, and acutely over the last several weeks, divisions that have laid under the surface have bubbled above ground. Lines are being drawn and we will be tempted not towards community but towards isolation. The isolation may not be individual but ideological. We will be tempted to self-protect by isolating ourselves from those who differ with us politically, ethnically and from those who express their ideas differently in both. There is a very real threat to our community. Beloved, as always, when we face threats from the world and the evil one, we must stand with Christ and one another. We are being tested. Are we going to respond in faith or fear? In love for neighbor or love of self? If you love those who think like you, what reward will you get, even the sinners do that? I am concerned for us as a community, but I am also hopeful.
Dangers and threats reveal opportunities. Two are better than one and one in Christ is better than all. Beloved, we are members of one another. One Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. You will be tempted to harbor bitterness towards one another in the body because of their political and social views and how they share those views with the world. You will be tempted to think of the importance of your own ideas more than your love for others. Beloved, we is better than me. What will we show the world? The days ahead are going to be hard. We are on a dangerous and perilous journey and woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up for two will withstand and a threefold cord is not quickly broken. We is better than me. We are the blood-bought family of God called to love one another. Will that be our testimony? What will the world see?
Is your life marked with Pride or Humility?
The Preacher ends this section with a story of a foolish king, this preacher wants to end this story pointing to another King. Ecclesiastes 4:13–16,
[13] Better was a poor and wise youth than an old and foolish king who no longer knew how to take advice. [14] For he went from prison to the throne, though in his own kingdom he had been born poor. [15] I saw all the living who move about under the sun, along with that youth who was to stand in the king's place. [16] There was no end of all the people, all of whom he led. Yet those who come later will not rejoice in him. Surely this also is vanity and a striving after wind.
The Preacher offers an example of an old foolish king who no longer listened to advice, but rather chose to listen to his own pride. The poor and wise youth with a teachable frame will one day stand in the place of the King. Who are more like? Is your life marked with pride or humility?
As believers, we follow the poor and wise youth who would become the humble King who would be exalted over all the people of the earth. Jesus showed how we is better than me. The Apostle Paul wrote to the church at Philippi, a church he dearly, dearly loved whose unity and togetherness was being challenged. He exhorted that church to live in humility by looking to the humble King. I want to offer the same counsel to us together. Philippians 2:1–11
[1] So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, [2] complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. [3] Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. [4] Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. [5] Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, [6] who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, [7] but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. [8] And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. [9] Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, [10] so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, [11] and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Jesus’ life was marked by humility. He emptied himself taking the very nature of a servant and laid down his life for us. Therefore, God exalted him to the highest place. Friends, God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Pride says I can live without God, humility says I desperately need hm. Pride says I have no sin, humility says I am the chief of sinners. Pride leads to death, humility leads to life. Friend, if you have yet to turn from your sin, let me invite you today to lay down your pride and come to Christ. He laid down his life for you and only those who trust in death and resurrection who recognize their sin and need for Savior who humble themselves before God will be forgiven and live. Believer, if you are in Christ, your life should be marked by humility, love and self-sacrifice. Is it? If not, repent. Come back to the way of Christ.
The way of Jesus is we not me. Jesus lived for us. Jesus died for us. Jesus rose for us. The poor and wise youth became the humble king and there is no end of all the people whom he leads. Jesus is leading us now from the right hand of God, the King of kings and the Lord of lords, the head of the Church, Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Lamb who was slain, and is inviting us to deny yourself, lay down our pride, pick up our cross and follow him. Is your life marked by Jesus? The way of Jesus is we is better than me. The best life is not for me but we. Two is better than one, and one in Christ is best of all. What will mark your life? Envy or Contentment? Isolation or Community? Pride or Humility?
[1] Gibson, David, 71.
[2] Two books to help you grow in contentment. The classic by Jeremiah Burroughs, The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment and the brand new one byErick Raymond, Chasing Contentment: Trusting God in a Discontented Age.
[3] Gibson, 75.
Ryken, 115.