Who do you love?

Who do you Love?

2 Timothy 3:1-9


In his classic work, The City of God, Augustine wrote of the difference between the city of man vs. the city of God,

Accordingly, two cities have been formed by two loves: the earthly by the love of self, even to the contempt of God; the heavenly by the love of God, even to the contempt of self. The former, in a word, glories in itself, the latter in the Lord. For the one seeks glory from men; but the greatest glory of the other is God, the witness of conscience. The one lifts up its head in its own glory; the other says to its God, “Thou art my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.” 

Two loves. The love of self and the love of God. Love is the determining factor to whom you belong. The love of self links you to the earthly city while the love of God connects you to the heavenly city. But it is not just what you love but it is the order of your loves. Augustine also writes,

But living a just and holy life requires one to be capable of an objective and impartial evaluation of things: to love things, that is to say, in the right order, so that you do not love what is not to be loved, or fail to love what is to be loved, or have a greater love for what should be loved less, or an equal love for things that should be loved less or more, or a lesser or greater love for things that should be loved equally.

We have to love the right things in the right order in the right way. If we love food too much, we become gluttonous. If we love sleep too much, we become slothful. Food and sleep are both good and both necessary, but must be appreciated or loved in their proper place. 

A wrongly ordered love reveals where one belongs. The Apostle John warns of a wrongly ordered love in his first letter, 1 John 2:15–17,

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever. 

If you love the world and the things of the world, over and above God, the love of God the Father is not in you. What do you love? Or better yet, who do you love?

Loving the wrong things or loving the right things too much, is why our world is the way it is. It is why families are broken, why relationships fracture, and why there is difficulty in these last days. Before Apostle Paul was executed, he warned Timothy of the difficulty that would come because of wrongly ordered love. 


The Difficulty of the Last Days

Paul knew Timothy’s charge in Ephesus would be difficult. He was dealing with leaders who have swerved from the truth and a congregation who were entertaining false teaching. Paul has called him to suffer well, to be a worker who is approved by God who rightly handles the truth, to cleanse himself of what is dishonorable so that he would be useful to the master of the house. He encourages him to patiently teach those who oppose him for God may perhaps grant them repentance to the knowledge of the truth. Paul does not sugarcoat what he will be dealing with, 2 Timothy 3:1,


But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.

Know this, Timothy, in the last days it will be hard. Paul is not speaking of some future reality, but present day. Timothy was living in the last days as we are living in the last days. Peter declared at Pentecost the fulfillment of Joel’s prophecy, Acts 2:17a

And in the last days it shall be, God declares,

that I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh,

And years later, the writer of Hebrews, confirms the same reality, Hebrews 1:1–2,

Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed the heir of all things, through whom also he created the world. 

We are living in the last days. And in these last days, there will be times of difficulty. 

Paul is a good mentor. He is honest. He tells the truth. Life will be hard. Timothy needed to know what he was facing. Beloved, there will be times of difficulty. Everyone here will face trouble. You will experience the harsh reality of living in the last days. Know this. Setting proper expectations protects against discouragement. If you think a movie is going to be great, but it is only pretty good, you often walk out of the movie disappointed. If you think a move is going to be ok, but is only pretty good you walk out of the movie happy. Why? Expectations. Paul is giving Timothy realistic expectations of what his life will be like as a pastor. 

Do you have realistic expectations of your life? Of your spouse? Your children? Do you expect your life to be easy or hard? Do you expect ethings to be handed to you? Are you projecting your expectations of yourself onto others? Are you regularly discouraged with others? Maybe your expectations are off. Have you ever said, “I didn’t think it would be this hard?” 

Let me act as a good mentor, “Understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.” Be ready.  Set proper expectations


The Devastating Effects of Self-Love

Paul warns Timothy of the difficulty in the last days and then clarifies where difficulty is coming from. It is not natural disasters and economic upheaval, it is difficult people. Paul provides a general vice list of what he will face, but probably has the false teachers in mind when he wrote it. I am calling this list, ‘The Devastating Effects of Self-Love,’ because they seem to all be a by-product of loving self over God. One more note before we look at the list. Although the list is a description of those who are not following Jesus in the world in general, Paul is also referring to people in the church. So we do not want to read this list as people out there, but ask if any of these characteristics reflect us. And ask if there are seeds of any of these sins in your own life. 2 Timothy 3:2–5a,

For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.

When the love of God is replaced with love of self, devastation follows. As one pastor notes,

Self-centeredness, and material advantages, when they become the chief objects of affection, destroy all moral values, and the subsequent list of vices is their natural fruit.

Let’s work through this list,

Lovers of Self - is at its root self-centeredness. It is putting yourself above others. In these ‘last days,’ we hear many people talk of ‘self-love.’ One author defines self-love this way,

Self-love is an introspective prioritization of self, aiming at a deeper love and acceptance of self. It is a meditative focus on one’s own positive traits. Self-love seeks freedom from negative thoughts about oneself — whether guilt or insecurity or even awkwardness. It is seen as the key to the love of others and the love of God, because as long as there is any discontent with self, we are unable to devote ourselves to these.

The argument of self-love in our culture, and even in the church, is we can’t love others unless we first love ourselves. It was born out of the self-esteem movement of the 80s when children were taught to love themselves. We do not need more self-esteem but more God-esteem. The self-love movement has become the norm. “I just need a little me-time.” “I just need to focus on myself.” “I need to put myself first for awhile.” And yet, Jesus said, Luke 9:23,

And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 

Paul writes in Philippians 2:3–4,

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 

As I was working on this section, I could feel all this uneasiness in me, challenging you not to put yourself first, thinking, “How will people respond to this?” I think there will be a cultural reflex that says, “But am I not supposed to care for myself first before I can care for others?” I’m going to let you wrestle with this one. Are you a lover of self, first? Or are you a lover of God?

Again, Paul is speaking to Timothy to warn him about leaders in the church who love self over God. John mentions one in his last letter, 3 John 9–10,

I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church.

Those who love self first should never be in leadership of the church. 

The rest of the list are effects of loving oneself first. Let's go through the rest of the list quickly by asking a few questions on each vice.

Lovers of money - Is your driving motive in life to make more money? Do you live in fear of not having enough retirement or savings? Are you generous? 

Proud - Are you willing to admit mistakes? 

Arrogant - Do you feel others can’t teach you anything? Do you think you always know what’s best?

Abusive - Are you harsh with people? Are you overly critical?

Disobedient to Parents - Do you listen and obey what your parents ask you to do? Do you see your parents as gifts for your good? Do you roll your eyes when they give you instructions? Do you strive to honor them in how you obey them or to do the bare minimum? 

Ungrateful - Do you complain a lot?

Unholy - Are you living in any unrepentant sin? Are you hiding any secret sin?

Heartless - Do you have compassion for those hurting? Are you cold to those suffering?

Unappeasable - Are you ever satisfied with what others do for you or do you always want more? Are you quick to point out what others did wrong? Are you unwilling to forgive? Do you expect perfection?

Slanderous - Do you lie about others? Do you speculate about others motives and share them as facts?

Without Self-Control - Do you act impulsively? Are you driven by your desires and fleshly appetites?

Brutal - Do you take pride in how blunt you are to others? Do you speak without regard to others feelings?

Not loving good - Do you laugh at evil? Do you appreciate virtue in others? Which do you love more, great skill or great character?

Treacherous - Are you loyal? Do you keep your word? 

Reckless - Do you act without thinking? Are you hot-headed? 

Swollen with Conceit - Do you think more of yourself than others? Do you overestimate your own gifts and talents? 

Lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God - Do you live for pleasure or to serve God? What do you love most, physical satisfaction or spiritual contentment? Is it easy for you to deny yourself?

I pray that none of us here are giving ourselves over to any one of these traits, but I am confident that there may be seeds in all of our hearts that left unchecked can grow and bring devastating effects to our lives. Till the soil of your heart. Pull the weeds of self-love. For we do not want to have the appearance of godliness but denying its power. We do not want the appearance of godliness but godliness. We do not want to be Christians by pretense without having the power of the Holy Spirit to empower and sanctify us for God’s purposes. 

The false teachers of Ephesus were those who tried to claim Christ but never knew him. They claimed Christ, but denied him by their actions. As one author notes, 

True Christianity consists not in the show of religiosity but in the powerful proclamation of the gospel accompanied by the life of obedience that conforms to the demands of the gospel.

Beloved, let that never be said of us. Let us confess the truth and live by the truth. Let us confess we are sinners and our desperate need for a Savior. 

Friend, if you realized this list described you, God wants you to repent. He does not want you to be a lover of self, but a lover of God and what is good. We know this because God sent Jesus Christ as a perfect picture of what he wants of us. He came to live the life we could not live because of our sin. He came to die the death that we deserved. In his love for the Father, He laid down his life to pay our debt. And in the Father’s love for him, Jesus was raised from the dead. So now, those who were lovers of self, can become lovers of God. We can re-order our loves. We can make the love of God supreme. And when we do, our lives will realign with his purpose. Friend, turn from your sin and trust in Christ. 

After detailing the list of a life that is set against God and for one’s self, Paul gives a command to Timothy at the end of verse 5, “Avoid such people.” These people should never be leaders in the church. They should not even be members of the church. They are dangerous and need to be removed from the church body. They will bring nothing but devastation to the body. They are a cancerous tumor that needs to be cut out. They are an infected tooth that needs to be pulled. 

Paul is not referring merely to those who oppose the truth but those who have hardened themselves against the truth and have become actively hostile towards it. He refers to the false teachers in Ephesus who have dug their heels in and are unwilling to listen to reason. There comes a point when someone becomes so entrenched in their opposition against the truth that you must merely avoid them and let them live in their opposition. 


The Danger of False Teachers

The false teachers in Ephesus were going after the weak and the vulnerable. Paul continues with an example, 2 Timothy 3:6–8,

For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth. Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men corrupted in mind and disqualified regarding the faith. 

First, he makes the comment about the target of these false teachers. They are going after specific women in the church. Paul is not making statements about all women but a particular subset of women in Ephesus. If you read the 1 and 2 Timothy, Paul provides lots of instruction to Timothy in how to care for women. He gives instruction in caring for both young and older widows and helping to discern those who are walking in the truth. Here he is addressing women who are burdened with a number of the past sins they have committed and who are currently living in those sins being led by various passions. Since they are being governed by their desires, they are more susceptible to false teachers who are preying on those desires. 

He describes them as always learning and never able to arrive at the knowledge of the truth. The knowledge of the truth is more of a technical term for the right understanding of the gospel. These women are willing to listen to false teachers and want all forms of new religious instruction but they do not actually want the truth. Paul is probably referring to those who want freedom from the restraints of holiness and a way to live without the restraint of self-control. We do not know precisely what the false teachers are teaching, but we do know it is in opposition to the truth. Notice the danger posed by these false teachers, they capture these women. They are luring and enticing these women away from the truth. Their teaching is leading them to destruction.

Paul refers to them as like Jannes and Jambres. These names are not in the Bible, but according to church tradition, these were the magicians of Pharaoh’s court that opposed Moses. Moses threw down his staff and it became a snake. They threw down their staffs and also became snakes but were swallowed up by the snake from Moses’ staff. Jannes and Jambres opposed the truth and actively worked against it. And Paul says that the false teachers in Ephesus were like these men, corrupted in mind and disqualified regarding the faith. Their opposition put them at odds with God and separated them from the faith. 


The Disclosure of Folly

Although this has not been a hopeful passage, Paul concludes with a note for Timothy not to worry. 2 Timothy 3:9,

But they will not get very far, for their folly will be plain to all, as was that of those two men. 

Those who oppose the truth, they may make some progress, but eventually they will be exposed. Jannes and Jambres were able to turn their staff into snakes, but could do nothing with the gnats and nothing with the boils. They could not stand against the true power of God. And the same will be for all those who oppose the truth. Their folly will be made evident to all. 

God wins in the end. All that which is hidden will be brought to light. Do not think that if you oppose God here you will make it in the end. God will not be mocked. Paul writes about the day of judgment and says in Romans 2:16,

on that day when, according to my gospel, God judges the secrets of men by Christ Jesus. 

Listen to the words of Jesusm in Luke 12:1–7,

In the meantime, when so many thousands of the people had gathered together that they were trampling one another, he began to say to his disciples first, “Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy. Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops.

“I tell you, my friends, do not fear those who kill the body, and after that have nothing more that they can do. But I will warn you whom to fear: fear him who, after he has killed, has authority to cast into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear him! Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.

Jesus knows and sees all. Those who have the appearance of godliness but do not have the Holy Spirit will be exposed. Those who live in unholiness and sin will be exposed. Those who live in the dark will be brought to light. Fear the Lord. The Lord is the one who has real authority.

Timothy needed to be reminded of this. As a leader in the church, he could have been overwhelmed with these times of difficulty. And Paul didn’t sugarcoat it. Times will be hard, but the Lord is in charge. He loves you and is with you. He has not forgotten you. He will always be with you. He will never leave you or forsake you. If he took care of the birds, he will take care of you. 

Beloved, let me say the same to you. God is with you. We know the times will be difficult. We can look at our world and see the devastation of self-love. We can see the devastation of the transgender movement. We can see the devastation of abortion. We can see the devastation of sexual promiscuity. We can see the devastation of greed and arrogance. We can see it. We can see how it may appear that they are going to win the day. But they won’t. One day their folly will be made evident to all. We do not have to worry. All we have to do is believe in God, live for him, and wait for his timing. We believe, we live, we wait. This is the Christian life. 

We know we are in the last days. And just think of that phrase, "the last days.” It implies that we are close to the end. It implies that the days of evil and lovers of self will soon be over. They will not last but their deeds will be exposed. So what are we to do?

1 - Repent of any sin in our life and put to death the deeds of the flesh - cleanse ourselves from what is dishonorable and be useful to the master of the house. In what ways has the Spirit exposed self-love in this sermon? Confess it and turn from it. 

2 - Share the gospel to those who are lovers of self - let us love people who know to tell them the truth for God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth.

3 - Be wise who you follow - do not listen to false teachers who tickle the ears to make you feel comfortable in your sins. Do not appoint leaders of the church who are lovers of self over lovers of God. Avoid those who love themselves over God and his people.

4 - Live for that Day - The day is coming when all will be laid bare before Jesus Christ. All things hidden will be exposed. Live for that day. Live a life before the face of God now so you have nothing to be ashamed of. Live to see Jesus.

5 - Love God and Love neighbor - Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your soul, and with all your strength. This is the first and the greatest commandment. The second is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the prophets. 

Jesus asked Peter three times, “Do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me?” So, my friend, one last question for you, “Who do you love?” Who do you love? Who do you love?